The things I take for granted... or maybe, better said, I usually take for granted.
Life, being able to drive my car, having a car at all, having a family and friends, having a roof over my head, being able to hear and see and feel, being "healthy", walking, talking, being able to love ....
There are tons of things that I really believe most people don't really appreciate as much as they should in life. I mean, even the littlest thing that one takes for granted could be missing the next day, I mean really missing, you feel it's just not there anymore.
I'm glad I still have both my parents. For some people having parents is even not so self-evident. I know I should visit my parents a lot more than I do right now, but I just somehow don't get around to as often as I would like to.
I guess I take for granted that they're there and that they're likely to be there the next day too... although that's not necissarily true. You know what I mean?
I only have one grandparent left... she's in the hospital right now. She's ill. I haven't visitted her in such a long time that I even think that my paying her a visit in the hospital might make her think that I just came to say goodbye or something. I know it sounds awefull, but I guess I'm a bit ashamed of not being with my family as much as i should be. And I could make promisses right here saying that I'll visit more often, but I just know I'll break that promise. My intentions are good, and I love every single person of my family A LOT. But I'm so busy, and they all live so far away from me that I just don't make the time to. I do feel guilty about that.
Especially when I see that in all his pride and joy about my career my dad tells my family about my career, and they end up sending me an e-mail and/or signing my guestbook.
I usually cry when I see that. It just moves me the way they, in their own way, are proud of me, even though some of them haven't even seen me in years.
I wish things were different, but they just aren't. We all have our own lives and I really hope from the bottom of my heart that they all know that I do think about them from time to time, and that I do love them. .... - sigh - I wish they were all here, so I could give them all a hug, you know... (although I think that some would feel a bit uncomfortable if I'd do that, lol) but still, I should appreciate my family more.
As you may have noticed, money itself is not on my list of things I take for granted. Maybe I do take that for granted somewhat, but I've been through hell only a little while ago and I admire people who are able to push themselves through life that way, every day. I don't know if I would be able to do that. But I do know what it's like to consider every buy fifty times, even butter or cheese or whatever had to be thought of in a "do-I-really-need-this-to-survive?" kind of way.
And besides, money does not make the world go round. It usually even makes the world go wrong. It's love for live, love to live, love for everything that makes the world go round.
So to anyone who reads this: "please don't let your mind get trouble by minor issues like e.g. what channel your going to watch, or you can't see this or that show, or that your partners is late for dinner or whatever. Don't get into fights over things that really don't matter in the long run you know? Think about what does matter to you as a person, as a human being. Think about what you have, appreciate every little thing, cuz it may not be there the next day. Make sure that you're never angry at eachother when you say goodbye. Think about the difference things, thoughts, actions, words can make in the long run. Cuz that's what counts. Accept eachother for what you are, don't deny another person isn't what you believe they should be. And most of all. LIVE YOUR LIFE, don't be live. Don't live your life pretending, JUST BE." - Hope that makes sense. (hope I didn't sound like I was preaching or anything.... I did huh? ... Oh well... ) I just needed to get some stuff off my chest cuz I really think people get carried away in things that don't really matter in the end you know. Like they're not really aware of the value of life and all things and people around them. that's all.
I'll end this entry by addressing my family and friends and all the people that have always been there for me, if you don't mind.
I want you to know that I love you all, forever.
Love,
Marsha.
ps. don't have the time for a spell check so I hope there aren't too many mistakes in this one here.